New Immigration Policy Allows Families To Compete In Thrilling Game Show To Win Their Children Back

New Immigration Policy Allows Families To Compete In Thrilling Game Show To Win Their Children Back

June 18th - Reports indicate that the United States will soon be making a major change to their controversial immigration policy. The report comes just hours after legislation was passed that would allow separated families to compete in a game show in a thrilling effort to reunite with their children.

The game show will be loosely based on the popular game show “Who Wants To Be a Millionaire,” but instead of playing for a million dollars the contestants will be playing for a chance to win their children back from U.S. detention facilities.

“While I can’t say that I’m completely satisfied with the new policy, I must admit that it brings a new level of excitement to the future safety and well-being of my four-year-old child,” said Rebeca Gonzalez, who will be the very first contestant on ‘Who Wants To Win Their Family Back’ (airing Sundays on FOX). “I think I have a decent chance at winning my child back, but apparently the second prize is a new hammock, so at least I know I won’t be walking away empty-handed.”

The White House has announced that the first episode of “Who Wants To Win Their Family Back” will begin shooting this week at a detention facility in El Paso, Texas.

“Despite the best efforts of foolish Democrats to derail this legislation, I am very proud of our new immigration policy, and I believe that our immigration ratings will be higher than ever before,” said President Trump. “I wish the best of luck to all of our future contestants. I’m really rooting for those kids to get back with their parents, if possible.”
REPORT: Studies Show 25% Increase From Eight To Ten

REPORT: Studies Show 25% Increase From Eight To Ten

Overworked Virtual Assistant Would Like To Know What’s Stopping You From Getting Up And Dimming The Fucking Lights Yourself

Overworked Virtual Assistant Would Like To Know What’s Stopping You From Getting Up And Dimming The Fucking Lights Yourself