Mailbox Wishes Mailman Would Stick Around To Cuddle Every Once In A While
April 7th - A local mailbox has developed a growing sense of resentment after the mailman has come and gone once again without even bothering to ask about the mailbox’s day.
“Day after day the mailman comes over and shoves all of his mail into my box without even asking me how I’m doing,” said the mailbox. “I know we agreed to keep it casual, but just once it would be nice if he stuck around and cuddled for a little while. At the very least, he could do me the courtesy of calling me every now and then, but at this point I’d settle for a text message telling me I looked nice today.”
The mailbox says that it will continue to accept the mail, but is clearly becoming irritated at the fact that the mailman refuses to show any effort to make their daily interaction feel special.
“I can handle an open relationship,” said the mailbox. “But he doesn’t even try to hide the fact that he’s giving mail to other mailboxes. As soon as he leaves, he’s on to the next mailbox on the street. It’s like he doesn’t even care. There’s no subtlety at all...I don’t know how much more of this I can take before I put my flag down for good.”