Are Millennials Ruining Racism?
April 9th - Sources say that millennials may be in the process of ruining yet another beloved tradition, as old-fashioned racism no longer seems to be as popular as it used to be.
Millennials, who are well known for destroying established traditions and customs such as using napkins, going on dinner dates, and having money, appear to be on the verge of killing the racism industry.
“I don’t understand how these kids function in the real world,” said Michelle, an aging ‘Baby Boomer’ who relies on her younger children to help her function in the real world. “First they stopped using cursive, then they started using their phones to gain constant access to information, and now it looks like they’re refusing to be outwardly racist towards their peers. I pity the future of our world.”
Millennials have fought back against the accusations, saying that they’re not intentionally trying to ruin racism for everyone.
“I know that being racist is a big part of our culture,” wrote one millennial in standard penmanship. “I just don’t think it’s right for me. I respect other people’s beliefs enough to allow them to continue to act the way they always have, but I can’t force myself to feel or act a certain way just because that’s the way it’s always been.”